Hands down, if you don’t

I was leaving the tiny office, I share with Zak, at the end of the day. As I switched off the lights and locked the door, a passing girl quipped “have you locked him in there?”, such is Zak’s popularity.

Separating Zak from fights is becoming increasingly commonplace. I can now restrain an angry child, while giving a supply teacher directions to the staff room. Who said men can’t multitask?. Zak also went for the fire alarm today and I stopped him with a second to spare. If I don’t have certified Ninja-like reflexes by the end of this term, I’ll feel shortchanged.

The school received a nice card from his parents. It said thank you for all our efforts, “especially with Zak”, as if it needed saying. He has a younger brother, who plays the ‘new kid’ role so much better than he does.

Zak stunned a generally rowdy class into silence, with the question “Hands up, who has cancer?”. I took the opportunity to remove him from the class and explain why that wasn’t an appropriate question. At the same time I silently pondered whether “Hands up, who has cancer?” has any quiz show potential.

At the end of a bitterly cold day, a random child hugged me, and just as quickly moved on. I wondered why she did this. Did she confuse me for someone else? was I part of a World Record attempt for hugging? maybe I just looked like I needed one.

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